Lions & Tigers & Bears - Oh My!

No, you don’t need to be scared of them at least not in China. You need to fear the “Yellow Brick Road”. I have decided that the most dangerous thing in China is walking. When it rains the beautiful white floors in every building are like ICE. Look at the photo above. See those cute decorative black squares strategically placed like little mine fields in the walkway. They are treacherous icy patches that will trip you every time you absent mindedly forget about how slippery they are while walking in the rain. Oh, and on those really muggy days the beautiful white floors sweat just enough to acquire a nice slick surface. I feel like I should wear one of those padded suits that Bill Murray wore in Charlie’s Angles (Don’t play dumb, I know you guys really saw that movie). And yet another reason why they like to hire young teachers – less risk of broken hips. Don’t worry I am very careful. Just picture me walking very ‘gingerly’ whenever you see a rain forecast for Hangzhou.

Side Note: Yesterday I got a 5 dollar-70 minute foot massage. I had taken my camera to document the occasion but I was in such ecstasy that I forgot. Sorry, I will take a picture another time during one of my WEEKLY visits.

Era

When I asked my students what they collected as kids I assumed I would get the standard kind of answers: Beany Babies, stamps, coins, Baseball Cards, Matchbox cars, and whatever the latest movie connected toy was. I was so shocked when Emily said she collected erasers that I thought I misunderstood her and made her repeat it several times. Even after comprehension dawned on me I still didn’t believe her so she actually brought her collection from home and showed me. The students are so nice to me! Do kids in the US collect erasers? Am I really over the hill and have no concept of what is popular with the kids in the states? I guess I need to get back to the US classroom to learn what is popular again. No wonder they want younger teachers over here – they are ‘with it’ and I don’t have a clue!

Stinky Tofu

There is a shopping area up the road in amongst 3 of the largest universities that has a particular odor about it. I would describe the smell as a bunch of boys’ used gym socks that have been stuffed with garbage. That unforgettable smell is the odor of frying chòu dòufu better known as “Stinky Tofu”. Stinky tofu is said to have been a favorite food of Mao Zedong. The tofu itself is fermented for about 6 months before being cut into square pieces. It can be eaten cold, steamed, or stewed but it is most commonly fried. One Friday night one of my students, Phocion ordered some for our table. Ricky was brave enough to try it. I couldn’t get it past my nose. Even though Ricky only had part of a small piece he said that he retained that peculiar nasty taste throughout the rest of the meal, no matter what he ate. Phocion ate the whole serving and lived. (and he said he likes it) Amazing! It is a smell that I will remember for the rest of my life. The picture above is Ricky BEFORE tasting it.

Bad English T-Shirts

No, not cuss words as some of you are thinking. Some of the student’s T-Shirts are written in English but if you take a moment to read them they won’t make ANY sense. There are so many misspellings and incorrect usage, that a real English teacher would have a field day with her red pen. It is almost like they take a bunch of words that are popular and throw them randomly onto the shirt. I wear one that says “Easy Tasks Leisure” it was one of those rare t-shirts that was large enough for me so I bought it, but I kept thinking that it was a contradiction in terms – Easy with Tasks and adding Leisure? I don’t know how you define leisure but anything that is a task is probably something I don’t want to do and I would never do it during my leisure time. I recently held a contest and gave a prize to the Best “Bad English T-shirt”. I can’t take credit for this great idea, it was David’s brainstorm, a friend of Nathan’s and Elizabeth’s. He was a foreign language teacher at a college down the street when the “stinky tofu” is made. (But that is another story).

Last Tango in Paris

They call Shanghai the “Paris of the East” and it was our last tour day together. Also Shanghai has its own special feel about it, lots of energy, sort of reminds me of a big city in the mid 70’s early 80’s when everybody was making money and disco was big. Shanghai is a good picture of how fast China is growing but it doesn’t give a good picture of the people in China. For that matter neither does Hangzhou. Shanghai Province and Zhejiang Province (where Hangzhou is located) are very well off areas with many affluent Chinese and that is not “the norm’. Before the 1990’s there was 1 skyscraper in Shanghai’s PuDong district now there are more than 300. (great article in the NYTimes- you have to register but its free http://www.nytimes.com/2005/10/18/business/worldbusiness/18bubble.html )

I was starting to get teary eyed every time I thought about going back to Hangzhou and my semi-solitude. Sometimes I get weary trying to talk slowly and remembering to leave out all the slang we use. You really start to notice how much Americans use slang once you are in a country where the meaning of certain phases are not understood.

After a nice breakfast in the hotel we joined Marco our guide for another day of touring Shanghai. First stop was a couple of hours at the Shanghai Museum, a must see for any Shanghai visitor. Afterwards we did lots of successful shopping at the museum store. No bargaining, but you were pretty sure about the quality. You really never know what you are buying in most places. On Saturday we saw an obvious storeowner bargaining at the knock - off stall we were in for 50 shirts that he was going to pick up the next day. What prices do you think he was going to charge for the shirts, when he got them in his store?
Next stop was visiting the home of Dr. Sun Yat Sen, the founder of modern China. The house and backyard looked like it belonged on Union Street in Brunswick Georgia. The plants were the same and the type of landscape was very similar. Look at the picture of Maria standing under a Magnolia tree, don’t those plants look familiar. We later found out that the second wife of Dr. Sun was Song Quigling, who lived in Georgia. Song Qingling is second of three famous daughters of Charlie Soong, a former missionary and owner of a printing firm. Her sister, Song Meiling, was famous too. She was the wife of Chiang Kai Shek. Both sisters were raised in America and went to Wesleyan College for Women in Macon, Georgia. Small world isn’t it.

Last stop was the Jade Buddha Temple. There are two jade Buddha were brought from Burma in the 1800’s. The Sitting Buddha and the Recumbent Buddha are carved with whole white jade. After this stop I sadly left the Paula and Maria and went to the train station to wait for my train home. The next day Paula and Maria got to ride the Mag-Kev a German really fast train – that took them to the airport. I was extremely jealous that they got to go on that train. I am going to try and do the train right before I come home in July.

You Get What You Pay For

Katie’s Cheap tour of HangZhou started out with a bus ride & short walk to West Lake. P & M weren’t crazy about the walking part in the light rain but that is the only way I know how to get there. Unfortunately when they decided to let a “Loawai” guide that only knows 3 bus lines out of Hangzhou’s hundreds and can’t read the bus stop signs they got what they paid for. We walked around the park and had tea in a little small lakeside restaurant. After our walk we caught a taxi to Lingyin Temple, which is know as one of the ten most famous Buddhist temples of China. The driver really wanted to take us to the Tea Museum but we were under a time constraint so after much pointing and gesturing we finally convinced him to take us to the Temple and not where he wanted us to go. There were lots of carvings of Buddha including the laughing Buddha in the side of a mountain. We walked thru more large temples with more Buddha, floor to ceiling carvings, and incense. Some of the carvings were really interesting but since it is a working temple you were not allowed to take pictures. We got another taxi ride to WuShan Square where they have a lot of souvenir shops and a great noodle restaurant. We enjoyed a great meal of beer and noodles and Paula managed to get most of the meal in her mouth with only a few noodles being flung across the floor.

Our real excitement for the day began after arriving at the train station. After we put our luggage thru the security checkpoint, we were stopped by a customs agent who asked to see our passports. I am not sure why 3 ladies (one with gray hair) with backpacks looked like a real security risk but we were stopped anyway. In Shanghai, I had confidently told Paula and Maria that they would not need their passports and they could leave them in the hotel safe. They did bring their passport Xerox copies and I had my little red working certificate book. (It looks like a passport but it isn’t – it has my passport number, work visa number, and Chinese name and work address). They didn’t hesitate when looking at Maria’s copy but they hesitated such a long time with Paula’s that a crowd of other customs agents started gathering. Paula’s passport is about 10 years old and a lot has happened to Paula in those ten years. In her photo she had long straight brown hair, big round glasses, and a dorky looking Christmas sweater. Now she has short curly blond hair, no glasses, no dorky clothes and is 10 years more mature. They eventually figured out that we were harmless and let us go on.

This train adventure we had soft seat tickets so we were allowed to go into the soft seat waiting lounge where they served us tea. It was an uneventful trip back to Shanghai, but it was hell finding a taxi back to the hotel. We ended up walking about 2 miles around the perimeter of the station to find a taxi stand which ended up being the exact same point from where we started. Back at the hotel we had a nice dinner in the Hotel’s Chinese Restaurant and an memorable drink in the famous Jazz Bar. The Jazz Bar is a beautiful English style bar with the 6 oldest band members I have ever seen. I know you are suppose to respect the old but they were really really bad. Most of them were in their 80’s and I think they had forgotten some of the correct notes, but they tried hard. Just like the dancers we were watching. We made it thru 3 or 4 songs and figured it wouldn’t get any better so we went up to bed.

Blind Leading the Blinder

I was designated the official tour guide for the Hangzhou and Xiasha part of Paula’s and Maria’s QCA (Quickie China Adventure). You need to remember that I do not speak the language except for a few survival words and getting from one place to another without a taxi card or language skills is always a challenge. Add on top of that 2 jet-lagged people that think they need to depend on you and you have an idea of what we looked like. I definitely will not win any tour guide awards, but we didn’t get lost, we didn’t let the taxi driver con us into an unwanted stop at the ‘tea museum’ (where I am sure he would have gotten a cut) and we didn’t get hit by any moving vehicle. I have to admit that I did fail miserably in getting Paula and Maria across the streets. I had just recently figured out how to get myself across the streets but I am definitely not confident enough to get other people across. You have to be aggressive in crossing the streets or they will see the fear in your eyes and not wait for you. Also Paula still has the mistaken impression that when the little green walker sign is on – it is safe to walk. It still isn’t. The taxi drivers, motorbikes, and bicyclists see that as the golden opportunity to turn left or right. So sometimes it is actually safer to walk when the walker light is still red.

I have figured out why not many people get robbed over here – you always have to be so aware of your surroundings, traffic, bikes, foot placement and other people that a purse snatcher would never have that absentminded moment of opportunity that we so often give them in the states.

Well if I failed at tour guide-men-ship then Paula fails in chopstick skills. Above is a picture of her attempting to eat a baozi. Honest, it really is eaten with a chopstick. If you buy it off the streets it is wrapped in a super thin piece of plastic. You leave the baozi inside as you hold it and eat it. Not many Chinese use their fingers to eat food. It is either wrapped or you use a chopstick. You know you are good when you can hold a big piece of meat with your chopsticks and tear it with your teeth (remember there are no knifes here) without throwing the remainder across the floor or dropping it in your lap.

Paula's Packing Perils

On any trip Paula usually qualifies as the perfect packer. She has the smallest bag, smallest bottles for her cosmetics, cutest outfits, never lugs around something she doesn’t need and doesn’t forget things she does need. This trip she will remember as a pimple on her packing perfection (can you tell I making my students say tongue twisters to improve their English – except they are great with the ‘p’ they have trouble with the th, r, l, dr, and v’s). Anyway, this trip she brought 3 pairs of heavy shoes, which was 1 or 2 more than she needed. The funniest item she forgot was her bra. She doesn’t wear one on planes and there were none in her suitcase so when she did her ‘buck dancing’ for the students in English Corner it was very entertaining. Maria has a video of her dancing and we plan to use it for blackmailing purposes.

Hard Seats to Hangzhou

I cheated and got the Peace Hotel concierge to get our train tickets for us so I didn’t have to embarrass myself when attempting to buy them at the train station. Trains are divided into classes “Soft Seat” and “Hard Seats” There is a slight price difference 33 RMB ($4) for hard seats 47 RMB ($6) for soft seats for the 2 hour trip from Shanghai to Hangzhou. Hard seats are not really hard but the soft seat have a little more leg and seat room and the soft seat waiting room alone is worth the extra. We were unable to get soft seat tickets to Hangzhou so Maria and Paula had the full effect of 1000 heads turning at once when the ‘3 LoaWai’ walked into the packed hard seat waiting room. I am sure they had seen foreigners before but not without a tour guide, flag and lots of luggage. Except for my goodie suitcase I was lugging back to my apartment, all we had were small backpacks. After a sleepy 2 hour train ride, we arrived in Hangzhou and took a taxi to Xiasha. The poor driver had to figure out how to get there with just my pointing and my 3 Chinese directional words (left- zuo, right- you, and straight- zhi). Unfortunately, the poor guy had an added distraction. On the drive I felt like a little kid trying to show off all my toys at Christmas. I would get so excited that I kept pointing to places and things I wanted Paula and Maria to notice. Of course the driver assumed my pointing and strange talk meant that I wanted him to turn here or there. I learned to keep my finger down after a while. (Don’t worry I gave him a tip - which they do not expect).

We arrived safely at the hotel/apartment and got ready for our short trip on the ‘stuff it van’ to the DVD store and WuMei. I made them ride in the back – tee he he – In WuMei we bought some Great Wall wine. Paula said it was ok but not Great. It was sort of hard to tell which kind to buy so Paula selected a bottle that cost 60 RMB which is very expensive here – but only about 8 bucks in the US. I made them walk thru and experience the meat section of the supermarket with all the live eels, snakes, turtles, fish, frogs, and rabbits. It looks more like a pet store than a meat market but that is how they sell it. Food in the US hardly resembles its original beginnings. Our food is so processed and ‘homogenized’. Is that good or bad? Paula was definitely turned off by the live animals so it was bad for her. I am just glad I don’t have to gut or clean any live animals – give me those nice processed, pre-prepared homogenized, frozen dinners any day.

After our WuMei trip we rode back on the nice new B1 bus and joined Nathan, Elizabeth, and Ricky for a dinner together in our restaurant. Afterwards we all went to English Corner so Paula and Maria could see a typical classroom and meet some students. Paula and Maria were my “show and tell items. The kids enjoyed comparing Maria’s Yankee accent against Paula’s southern accent and they especially enjoyed the show that Paula put on. She did a ‘buck dance’ and some ham bone. I have no idea what the kids were thinking, but most of their mouths were open. I was laughing so hard I forgot to take pictures but Maria did.

Roof Top Drinks, Roof Top Weddings, & Beef

After our touring and shopping adventure we went up onto the roof of the Peace Hotel had a nice drink and enjoyed the view of the Bund and counting the number of weddings going on (3 or 4 in our hotel and one on the roof of another hotel). We had an early dinner where I ordered a steak. It wasn’t as good as Outback but it was the best beef I had tasted in 5 months. I don’t eat much red meat but about once a month I do get a craving and I had built up 4 months worth of cravings. Yummm. That night Maria crashed as soon as she hit the pillow and Paula feel asleep sitting up in bed and in the middle of a sentence

Side Note: - I tried to forget - but Paula would just nag me until I put this in .......At the Knock off Market Paula got a great compliment at MY EXPENSE. One of the stall clerks asked me if I was Paula's Mother! I would not let them stop in THAT stall -- also I attacked my gray sideburns with a pair of cuticle scissors when we got back to the hotel. Nicole - I need that hair color NOW.

Adventures in Shanghai's Knock-Off Market

art 3 of Saturday in Shanghai with Paula and Maria
After many warnings from the Marco and our driver, they let us off at Shanghai’s famous Knock –Off Market. We quickly escaped the ‘professional shopper’ that tried to ‘Shanghai’ us from our van to their store and found our way into the maze of stalls. It is way better with 3 people, the vendors don’t have one person to concentrate their efforts on. If you usually get gifts from Paula, Maria or myself….don’t read further - you might ruin the surprise.

Paula was looking for Tag Heuer watches. We found a couple of stalls that had what we wanted and each stall attendant made sure to bang them on their palm and hold them up to our ears saying “they are best quality, best quality” This happened in more than one stall – so maybe the attendants were given an instructional video to watch before selling the watches. We could never hear what I think we were supposed to hear, but we figured it was a good sign that they didn’t fall apart in the banging.

We were also looking for North Face jackets and again we were successful. But the Galland and the Willliam’s clans better not get together at the same time because they will look like an ad for a North Face Catalog. I picked up a pair of Dior sunglasses, and a Prada purse. I couldn’t leave Paula alone when the bargaining was going on – because she would feel sorry for clerks and give them whatever they asked for. I am sure Maria would have gotten the hang of it if she didn’t have jet lag, but I don’t think there is any hope for Paula. After a couple of hours of wandering thru the stalls (it is very easy to get disoriented) we safely found our way out and got a taxi back to the hotel using our ‘taxi card’. A taxi card is a business sized card that you can get from almost any business or hotel in China that tells the driver where to take you. It also has instructions in English for the passenger such as “get a receipt from the driver…”. These cards are great, make sure you ask for one anytime you are in a store or hotel in China that you might want to return to. Most drivers do not understand English maps.

Side Note - I forgot to mention in the second Shanghai blog that at breakfast this morning Paula added soy sauce or maple syrup to her coffee - she thought it was milk.

No Maria -We Are Not at Epcot

Early Saturday morning after my REM sleep and their naps, Paula and I walked on the famous Shanghai Bund to see if we could photograph some Tai Chi. We saw kite flying, dancing, and of course the traditional Tai Chi. We met Maria for a nice breakfast in the hotel with a great view of the river and started our tour of Shanghai with Marco at 9. First stop was the Childrens’ Palace. It is a school where artistically gifted children attend in the afternoons and on the weekends. We were impressed with their talent, especially the cute girls in their pink leotards. A lot of the parents and grandparents were watching from the sidelines or outside by the windows looking in. Maria really left an impression at the school (she stepped into some wet cement). Next stop was Yu Garden (Yuyuan) where Maria kept looking around saying –“ doesn’t this look like Epcot”. Here Marco taught us about how the windows and doors frame the scenery and how to tell the difference between the male lion and the female lion (male- pointy ears, hand on ball, female lion– head down, ears down, hand on baby). There were lots of dragons on the rooftops. President Clinton and Mrs Clinton ate in this park. Paula has decided that all presidents should be world travelers before they become president. She makes a good point!

Paula and Maria’s Quickie China Trip

After a frustrating false start Paula and Maria arrived a day later than expected on Friday night. After much smiling and hugging, I gave them a few minutes to dump off their bags and my goody stuffed suitcase, which they had lugged here for me. To fight the swollen legs you get on long flights we walked from our Peace Hotel down busy Nanjing Rd to Pearl City. Pearl City consists of about 20 different tiny stores that sell pearls. I had gone by earlier that day and scoped out a store that seemed the least pushy and easiest to bargain with. After a lot of bargaining, (which Paula is horrible at) we gave the “Lisa Pearls” niche a good bit of business. The store girls ended up working hard for their Yuan because they had to do a lot of restringing, with included knotting between each pearl. After we warmed up our credit cards we had a late dinner at Pizza Hut and walked back to the room. I slept great because the mattress was so soft when compared to mine but Maria and Paula’s time-confused body clocks never got that nice REM sleep they needed.

Chinese Chorus Competition

Last week I went to a talent show and if I understood the information correctly, (remember I lose a lot in my translation) it was a competition between our university’s freshman class chorus groups. Each major had their own chorus group with costumes and sang 2 patriotic songs. Some of the costumes were really fancy with white suits for the guys and evening dresses for the girls. I have decided that our English majors must have had a really small budget because their outfits were t-shirts and jeans. Each group sang the same first song and a different 2nd song. After about the 10th group, I got pretty good at humming along with the first song, but it would take me about 50 more repetitions to approximate the words.

It was the first time I had been in the school’s auditorium. As people entered, they were welcomed by a Communist youth group. Inside it was very nice, comfortable and very large. The only big difference in US theaters and China theaters was the movement and the noise levels. It sort of reminded me of a Friday night at the Island movie theater with the kids doing their usual musical chair routine in the front rows. Except here it never stopped or even slowed down when the show started. Cell phones going off, normal level conversations, and walking around all during the performances. So next time at the movies, don’t complaint about the guy behind you with the crinkly candy wrapper, you could be in China.