Last night my neighborhood crew threw me a “Going to China Party”. I probably should explain a little about our great but very unconventional ‘hood’. The ‘Hood’ or ‘Court’ as we call ourselves is a very eclectic group consisting of a welder, marina office manager, flight attendant, lawyer, a couple of teachers and artists. The more daring of the ‘hood’ dressed up as what they perceived to be stereotypical Chinese. Basically it was flip flops with socks, colorful silk bathrobes, along with straw steamer baskets tied with ribbons to their heads. The menu (of which I was ONLY one forced to use chopsticks with) had only one authentic oriental dish which was a great hot & sour soup - the rest was typical scrumptious Southern food: Shrimp Creole, jalapeño cornbread, coleslaw, salad, and of course lots of desserts. There were a couple of really creative items added to our fare. One wasa "Chinese Happy Meal" with chopsticks, a bag of cooked noodles, a can of water chestnuts, and a toy, but the"Redneck Fortune Cookies" triggered the most laughs. They split Oreo cookies and layered typed ‘fortunes’ into them. Here are some of the more publishable ones: Absence makes the heart go yonder, A day without sunshine is like Night, Dyslexics of the world – Untie!, A waist is a terrible thing to mind, Start every day off with a smile and get it over with, and my two favorites: Today is the dawn of a new error and A woman’s guess is much more accurate that a man’s certainty. What catchy phrases would you put in your Redneck Fortune Cookies?